by Robert Wilkinson
There is no problem in a human life that cannot be solved using “spiritual” or astrological solutions. Of course, the timing on what to do and when to do it is crucial if we are to avoid crashing up against each other’s biases and attitudes. This is why astrology can be used very successfully to resolve differences, if both are open to finding a way beyond conflict.
In our world, we are unfortunately put under a lot of pressures that are difficult, and some seek an outlet to relieve those emotional pressures in being unkind to loved ones. Obviously, this is not a satisfactory way to maintain and preserve healthy intimate relationships, as these types of releases usually create more problems and hard feelings.
Difficult feelings must be dealt with in productive ways if we don't want our relationships to crash. Today we’ll explore some productive ways to deal with conflicts that arise between us and others.
As part of any astrological approach to solving interpersonal problems, I believe that an attitude of loving-kindness is essential if we are to meet our "opponent" somewhere between where they stand and where we stand. We must be willing, as Gandhi asserted, to “thrash things out to the uttermost” to find the common ground with those who oppose us, or seem to oppose us.
If we are willing to set aside hostility yet be firm in our integrity and what we stand for spiritually, we become an agent of a greater spiritual power. As we tap into that power, we are able to transcend all the temporary forms of suffering caused by our own or others’ attachments, aversions, illusions, and habits of acting, thinking, and feeling which perpetuate conflict.
Every part of the life is governed by an astrological sign, regardless of which type of astrology one uses. In Western Astrology, as well as Vedic Astrology, each sign is in conflict with three other signs, as well as in harmony with four others, thus yielding much ground for seeing the causes of disputes as well as the ways to resolve them.
These complex relationships between areas of our lives show us why so many things create conflict in this world, and also how we can find a way beyond the conflicts. Most conflicts arise due to the fact that not all areas of life get along with each other, and imbalances created by people expecting things of another they would not want expected of them.
These imbalances must be resolved in a spirit of friendly cooperation if we would transcend the source of conflict, since no one wants to be disadvantaged in their life. And of course, if we don’t have a friendly relationship with another, then the differences can become more of a problem than they need to be.
Here a healthy respect for ourselves and others, especially our partner, is essential as a foundation for resolving disputes. We also need to have a genuine affection for the person we love, demonstrated through generating positivity instead of indifference or disrespect, both of which create more problems. If one party does not want to display positive effort, then the dispute is made more difficult and we may simply have to walk away, if only for a while.
I have always regarded conflict as a challenge to bring forth the power of our Higher Self. Through referencing the Higher Self, we come to a compassionate higher view of how we can examine the nature of the conflict to figure out which astrological energies must be used to deal with the problem.
For example, if the problem involves money or possessions, how to view them or how to use them, we are dealing with the energy of Taurus. Taurus is opposed by Scorpio (desire), and squared by Leo (pride) and Aquarius (willfulness). However, these signs also show positively when the dispute is resolved. All breakthroughs to solutions concerning money or values show elements of letting go of something to regenerate, (Scorpio), love, affection, (Leo), and friendship (Aquarius).
The key to finding the best possible outcome to any dispute, find the signs in harmony with the dispute. Further developing our example, Taurus is in harmony with Capricorn and Virgo. Thus financial issues can be understood clearly if we figure out who is responsible for what (Capricorn), and what practical adjustments must be made to restore the “health” of the finances (Virgo).
The signs in sextile, Cancer and Pisces, show how to make productive effort to move the oppositional energies of Taurus and Scorpio into a positive expression. This means that in all disputes involving money or values, sensitivity to needs and renunciation of fear or old habits (Cancer), and compassion, foresight, and accuracy of intuition (Pisces) will help us achieve productive movement.
In the case of a betrayal of some sort, we are dealing with the energies of Pisces. These disputes are not helped by criticism and worry (Virgo, the opposing sign), talking in circles (Gemini - square), or justifying a dualism (Sagittarius - square.) However, we can come to a clearer understanding of how to deal with betrayal through the signs in harmony with Pisces, those being Scorpio, Cancer, Taurus, and Capricorn.
When there has been a betrayal, we can make progress by invoking and manifesting the virtues of these Earth and Water signs. Among the traits of these signs we find a sensitivity to needs, values, responsibilities, and loyalty. We find tenderness, clarity, simplicity, and responsibility, with a willingness to regenerate by being clear about what must not corrupt the integrity of the relationship.
In another example, any dispute related to a miscommunication, interpretation, clash of ideas or perspectives involves a Gemini problem. If we’re in conflict with another around issues of truth, philosophy, or religious differences, we have a problem spotlighting Sagittarius energy.
Any Gemini or Sagittarius problem can be harmonized by using Aries, Libra, Leo, and Aquarius energies in productive ways. These approaches may involve such questions as: What is the truth or essential nature of both the lower and Higher Self in each view? What is fair, balanced, and reasonable? How can we play with these ideas creatively so that each sees the truth of the heart? How dispassionate and impersonal can we be in examining the larger context of the idea, interpretation, or perspective? Is this view leading to the greatest good for the greatest number, or is it limited?
These are just a few examples of how knowing something about astrology can help resolve many types of disputes. It is also useful to remember that some time periods are more difficult than others for everyone, and so some problems will pass if we don’t do anything to aggravate them. This is where knowing some astrology can help us stay calm in the midst of storms that affect everyone.
In any case, all challenges are useful in helping us resolve old karmic patterns, and move into a more effective expression of our Higher Self. And once we learn how to view problems and implement the corrective energies, we move beyond getting trapped in old patterns of conflict, and so shift our future karma.
Even though some people are more inclined to create problems than others, it is always on us not to lose our self-control, since that is not helpful. And in practicing our Higher Self, we learn how easy it is to avoid unnecessary conflicts before they arise. It is safe to say that if each party in a relationship is living their Higher Self the best they are able, all disputes are easily resolved.
(Extensively re-written from a 2005 article)
© Copyright 2005, 2012 Robert Wilkinson