by Robert Wilkinson
There are several ways to find out how compatible we are with another, and where our points of harmony and friction occur. Many have compatibility and/or composite charts done for a prospective loved one, and these offer much valuable information. There is another crucial chart to have calculated before we marry, and that's the Marriage chart, done for the time of initiating the marriage ceremony. This begins the adventure, and gives new momentum and energy to a relationship.
The Marriage chart is very important, like the timing on launching a business, starting a project, or when we buy or sell something. A crucial component of success in relationships, along with resources, tools, and skills, is the best time for beginning a partnership, project, or new initiative. The branch of astrology dealing with launching things is Electional (or Inceptional) Astrology, and is an art in itself. Each moment has its special qualities and challenges, and it's always good to launch our boats on a favorable tide.
That said, it is equally important to remember that it is impossible to counteract "real world" conditions. For instance, you can plant potatoes on the best day of the month astrologically, but will probably not get many potatoes if you've planted in November rather than April in Northern climes. By the same token, you may get a great deal on a house, but if the house has plumbing problems, you'll still have to deal with them. And yes, plumbing (or electrical, or foundation) problems can be seen in the chart of when you first look at a house, as well as when you close escrow.
A compatibility chart done using Synastry, tells a lot about whether two people are suited to each other. This is where we look at how person A's planets fall in person B's houses, and vise-versa, along with the aspects between all the rulers of houses. It reveals many intricacies between people, and where common ground can be found, if it can be found at all. We're usually attracted to various planet energies for all kinds of reasons, some of which change over time. That's why we fall into harmony and disharmony for whatever reasons.
While compatibility analysis is extremely important and revealing of points of harmony and conflict, there are other important charts that give valuable informaton about two people's compatibiility. One is a chart done for the time when two people first meet. Another is the composite chart. The composite chart is derived from the midpoints of the similar planets between two charts, i.e., if one is an Aquarius and the other is a Gemini, as a rule the composite Sun will be in Aries. And if one Moon is in Sagittarius and the other Moon is in Aquarius, the composite Moon is likely in Capricorn, the sign in between Sag and Aquarius.
The marriage chart is actually an Inceptional chart, in that a marriage is the inception of the contract of partnership. Thus it shows the past, present, and future of the individuals, as well as the composite unit. That's why it's important to find a time that is very compatible with the charts of both, and is compatible within itself. This is a specialized branch of Astrology, but crucial in the social-emotional realm of applying our craft.
If you know astrology, here are a few pointers to consider. In any marriage chart it is good to make sure that the natal chart rulers of the two people getting married are harmoniously aspected with each other, and if possible, the matual rulers of each's marriage house (7th house). FYI, "love affairs" are ruled by the 5th house, not the 7th. That's why even if one has a boyfriend or girlfriend for years but has never "married," then it cannot be counted as a 7th house activity. Contracts are governed by the 7th house, and marriage is a contract, both written and verbal.
The first marriage is ruled by the 7th house, as are all partnership circumstances throughout the life. The second marriage is ruled by the 9th house, the third marriage by the 11th house, and so on. This is the source of much confusion among amateur astrologers and novices at the craft, and the reason I ask people who come to me for a wedding date whether they've been married before or not. If I'm planning someone's second wedding, then their significator is the ruler of their 9th house and any planets in that house, and the 7th becomes more of a secondary generic influence.
When I first wrote this article, it was a great week for marriages, due to many favorable aspects made between the rulers of many signs. Another observation - it seemed that Jupiter in Libra brought more marriages to the fore than I remember in other years. Maybe Libra, the sign of marriage and partnership, is somehow expanded by Jupiter into a hopefulness and an adventure in partnership. Maybe marriages under the influence of Jupiter in Libra symbolized the archetype of what the higher truth of relationship is really all about.
Obviously there are many days where a marriage can be happy and last a long time. It sometimes depends on what time of day you're willing to do it, which is a consideration if one does not want to explain why the ceremony HAD to begin at 7:28 am on maybe 8:34 pm on any particular day. And what is good then may not be good done an hour earlier or later, due to rulership changes.
I'll close with the thought that even if a marriage chart has difficult aspects we may be able to create a favorable outcome if the foundations of affection, respect and heart-centered Love allow the Higher Self of each to come forth. Then we grow in Love and Wisdom despite the challenges we confront. We may not be able to control some events. We may not be able to control the responses of others. But we can always choose to see the Higher Way, since we are in fact, Spirits in the material world.
(Rewrite of a piece originally published 11 July 2005)
Greetings dear Wizard.. will you be finding your self in Long Island during the autumnal eclispes? Not sure if you still head out that way then, but the ocean breeze is singing a song for me and I wonder if I will see you there?
Thankyou kindly for sharing your insights and wisdoms,
Rebecca
Earthhorse
Posted by: Rebecca | August 17, 2006 at 01:05 PM
Hi again Rebecca - Yes, as of right now I expect to be back in the Hamptons in mid to late October. Still in the planning stages, but it's pretty for sure. And thanks for your vote of confidence about my "insights and wisdom." We hard working astrologers appreciate it.
Posted by: Robert | August 17, 2006 at 01:09 PM
I would be thrilled to know you are back in my home area of long island. My other favorite teacher is there and We only moved upstate a year ago. please let us know if/when where you may speak or one could arrange a private session or even a great cup of tea/coffee...till then, be well be loved and blessed be ~Brian
or...if its a well deserved break then may it be peaceful and free of harried requests for help. how can we make your stay more enjoyable?
Posted by: Brian | September 14, 2007 at 08:23 AM
Hi, Robert. How are you??? Lets say my chart ruler is the sun. Well, actualy it is. I would get along best with people whose ac makes favourable contacts with mine. Either in air or fire. I have alot of earth in my chart. I was told that I should try to find someone who has cap sun to compliment my moon in cap??? Also, you mentioned that each persons 7th house rullers needs to be in the fifth house. Do you mean that if my house ruler is uranus then my partner should have his fifth house ruled by uranus?
thanks
Posted by: Micheline Cloutier | September 14, 2007 at 05:54 PM
its interesting to note that you originally wrote this sentiment approx. 2 years ago, something that you explored that has now come to a conclusion?
Posted by: robyn | September 15, 2007 at 12:15 AM
Hi Brian - I used to go to the East End many times each year, but have only been there twice in over two years due to my hectic schedule. And I do love it (after the season is over!) as it's beautiful and I have some long time friends there. Yes, I do private sessions that book up quickly - contact me via email asap if you intend to make the trek - and yes, I always try to do a talk at Canio's Bookstore in Sag Harbor if the space is available when I'm there. And the coffee roaster out there is a Master of his craft, so a cup is certainly possible. Thanx for the blessings.
Hi Micheline - Soaring on a powerful magnetic wave that is testing me to be a good surfer while surrendering to Divine Will as best as I can, thaank yew verrra muuuuchhh.... People are attracted to others whose Sun, Moon, Ascendant, or Venus make contacts to any planet, as they become the expression of that planet in the person's life, whether short or long. Also, many times we attract another whose element balance complements our own. Fire tribes attract each other, as do the rest. And the Fire and Air work well together, as do the Earth and Water. You would be attracted to Capricorn energies, as it represents what you care about and how you nurture or are nurtured. Besides the Sun, you would also be attracted to someone with Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter or Neptune in Cap, Taurus, or Virgo.
Please re-read what I said about the 7th house. I never spoke of putting the ruler of the 7th in the 5th, only that the 5th is the house of affairs. And that our house rulers of self and marriage should be in harmony with theirs. This is not an absolute rule. Where there are Sun, Moon, Asc, Venus, Mars, Jupiter contacts there will always be magnetism. Wherever our house rulers are in harmony, we'll find ease of interaction. The subject is vast and complex, and beyond any meaningful discussion here. I probably should write a book on it.
Hi robyn - It's interesting to me that without intention, this is the second time I've posted an article in 13 month sequences. I'm not sure why you would feel something has "come to a conclusion" for me related to the topic of the article. What began then for me is streaking to the stars. This article offers a gloss on a very vast subject, and closes with insights based in my varied relationship experiences in life that we control only our own responses in this world, that the marriage chart matters, and that all relationship changes challenge us to practice our higher Loving Wisdom.
Posted by: Robert | September 15, 2007 at 07:41 AM
I enjoyed this article very much. I was unaware of the second and third marriages being in houses other than the 7th. Have a great day.
Posted by: Rian | September 15, 2007 at 09:08 AM
Hello Robert, This was really helpful, especially the part about first marriage in the seventh, second in the ninth, third in the eleventh, especially these days when we move on many times in one life time and one's marriage house can be the ninth and the other at the same time in the eleventh. Been reading Rudhar Archives at khaldea.com much recently and while knowing the world isn't there totally at the moment, feel less alone, less vulnerable. Shaun ps-thank you again for your time and energy.
Posted by: Shaun | September 15, 2007 at 01:53 PM
Hi, Robert thanks that was highly informative and helpful to me. You are right about aspects that favourably made between sun, moon, venus, jupiter and mars. There are definetely important I think. I hope that wave you are surfing is smooth and enjoyable ride.
Posted by: Micheline Cloutier | September 15, 2007 at 07:57 PM
Hi Rian - Yes, the ability to know which house rules what is perhaps THE most critical thing in assessing charts. While the 7th always represents any and all one-to-one relational dances, the more specific we are the more things make sense.
Hi Shaun - Glad you found khaldea. Rudhyar's work, along with Marc Jones, Carl P. Tobey, and Grant Lewi, are the masterworks of astrology in the 20th century, each exploring different but very important areas of the craft.
Hi Micheline - Surfing is always exciting, though not usually smooth! The wave is larger than I could ever have believed, and giving me the ride of a life!
Posted by: Robert | September 16, 2007 at 06:31 AM
Many questions, I just love it! Okay, you spoke above of the composite moon, what if the two moons are the same?
Also, have a son moving towards marriage. Love it, but complicated situation. In a nutshell rich gal, poor boy. For me, not tough, for most very tough situation.
In the composite chart, girl Libra sun, scorpio rising, sag moon. Boy, scorpio sun, capricorn rising, sag moon. Boy's chiron in Taurus falls on top of her chiron in taurus in 7th house. Most of his planets fall in her 1st and 2nd houses. Pluto, saturn, midheaven in her 12th. reverse, her dragons head in cancer falls on top of his dragons head in cancer in his 6th. Her sun, venus, pluto,saturn, mercury fall in his 9th. her moon falls in his 11th and uranus, 12th house her mars, neptune, dragons tail, and fortune. Her ascendant, jupiter fall in his tenth. Her chiron in taurus falls in his fourth house.
Using only my intuition, I see this as a Karmic relationship with much healing these two beings need. Almost like looking into a mirror. Somewhat like two people coming together to help the other get to their summit. Interesting the girls last name is in my family line. Lots of love here, but also anger at the mirror, and the mirror doesn't lie, it just reflects. That can be troubling for younger souls if they are looking to ride off into the sunset with the mirror tied to the horse tail. What do you see?
Another question, some partnerships I see, are not just about the ride off into the sunset type of partnership, but a working partnership in a specific area the being comes to work with. Example, I married a double sag. scorpio moon. I am Pisces, gemini rising, libra moon. I have Saturn in Sag falls in my 7th house. My husbands 7th is mostly cancer, with a little gemini, which is my rising. However,my husbands planets mostly fall in working in the outer world, between 10-12th. My moon,jupiter,dragons head, and neptune fall in his tenth house, which helps him with what he comes to do, tackle the work area. My sun in his 3rd. Unfortunately, my saturn sits on his ascendant. Poor guy. But,we have been married for 28 years, mostly smooth, two years of it not so smooth. Very interesting...we both chose exactly what we needed to get to our summit. We have no planets that fall in each others 12th. Is that also true, it's not good to have planets that fall in each others 12th. I guess that would depend on the support of the rest of the chart? Anyway, my long drawn out point was. It is very important for people to have an expert astrologer do these charts. Just for the reasons I stated above. It's too easy to say, well, we don't click because I don't have this or that falling in the 5th, 7th, or 9th. I will say this, I have had another strong relationship in my life where the man fell in my 5th house. It was exactly as you were stating, lots of passion and love, but he was a lover, which is refreshing, not a marriage partner. It really helped to see this through astrology because you intuitively feel something is missing, but it doesn't always make sense to the mind. Sorry for all the questions and comments, it's the old rising sign at work!! Thanks always for your articles and teaching. You are kind and have patience.
Posted by: Julia | September 20, 2007 at 03:53 PM
Hi Julia - It means both parties have similar ways of feeling and experiencing life, and so the composite will also. I really can't do a detailed compatibility about the karmic implications of this relationship, as there's too much to analyze to do it justice here. I don't know of any partnerships that "ride off into the sunset," and it seems to me that ALL long term intimate relationships are working partnerships. Yes, what you describe is a very close relationship with definite Dharmic implications, with the Saturn-Asc contact. And yes, 10th house contacts often benefit professionally the one whose 10th house it is. As for 12th house placements, my sweetheart's Asc, Uranus, Mars, Sun, Mercury, and SN fall in my 12th. She describes it as "knowing the inner me completely from the first time we faced each other," and I'd be inclined to agree. She has also helped me target unhelpful or just plain bad behaviors of associates that undermined me, bringing me sorrow or frustration. So yes, 12th house placements do help us understand things according to the other contacts in the chart. All contacts can bring forth growth and well being if both are determined to be cooperative with that in ways appropriate to each and both. Mister 5th house no doubt helped you learn to play.
Posted by: Robert | September 21, 2007 at 09:19 AM
Thanks Robert, very interesting. It is refreshing to hear different interpretations on partnerships and the 12th house. I am going along with you. Some astrologers in the ways they have been trained, really have a negative reading about plants that fall in the 12th house for relationship comparison. I understand how they could believe that, but, for me, I felt that this was a pretty narrow viewpoint, being it's the house of Pisces. Plus, my belief in Karma is a bit different. I don't look at Karma as coming to pay back anyone, etc...more along the lines of coming to experience and have choice to expand and create in a different creative pattern. I believe people sort of throw around the word Karma, it's very big and can be too big to encompass. Most I hear use it in more of the Arian teachings as, well you must have done something wrong, that's why you must pay. It was quite a convenient philosophy in the older times to keep the rich rich, and the poor poor. I am preaching to the choir I know, but my point was, I see this idea carried into many areas of the metaphysical community. So, it's great to hear!! I am always surprised when hearing these narrow views about any house or planets, that if there is only a strong negative focus that a more full perspective is not being considered. So, thank you again. Love and Light
Posted by: Julia | September 21, 2007 at 10:41 PM
Hello Robert,
Is it possible to have you do a marriage chart for my fiance and I? Or can you point me in the right direction to find someone skilled? We are trying to pick a date and I believe this would be extremely valuable information.
Thank you,
Naomi & Sean Paul
Posted by: naomi | November 24, 2007 at 11:59 AM
Hi Naomi and Sean Paul - Yes, in fact the time of marriage is crucial, and finding the best time to marry is one of my specialties. Email me at the address at the link on the left hand side of the front page below the archives above the blog roll.
Posted by: Robert | November 26, 2007 at 12:11 PM
Robert.
I love studying compatibility in natal charts, and have you ever seen two people who were born different years, dates, times, but have almost the same signs on the same houses in both natal charts? They may not be exact, but few degrees off.
Would this show the two people having simiilar personalities, or likes, dislikes, since the signs represent filters, and the houses are the areas of life that the signs influence and affect? I'm curious as to the significance of having similar houses and ruling signs in two natal charts.
Posted by: Lisa | December 01, 2007 at 04:04 PM
Hi Lisa - Sure. There are many who share close ascendant degrees, which can put similar signs on similar houses and maybe even very close degree parallels. Sometimes the similarities are striking. I been close with several people who have an Asc within a degree of mine, with the MC equally close. One was my songwriting partner back in the early 80s, born several years earlier than me, different month, time, and place, but we both had 11 Leo rising with Moon at 14 Aquarius in 7th and Mars at 24 Aries in 9th. Our songwriting was like two wings on one bird.
Posted by: Robert | December 02, 2007 at 03:26 PM
Your Highness,
How do you feel about one's sun/ venus/mercury conjunct my venus/ uranus in cancer in my 3th house and in the partner's cancer 8th house?
Snowed in chicago!
c
Posted by: chickie | December 05, 2007 at 09:31 AM
Can there ever be a composite Moon in Leo if partner A's moon lies in Capricorn? In what sign would partners' B moon have to be, if so?
Posted by: alisen | September 12, 2008 at 02:47 AM
Hi Alisen - It depends on which system of composite charts you're using. Using the midpoint of the angle between the two, it is not possible. But that system can yield some strange results if the two points are far enough apart. For ex., I've seen composite Mercury or Venus to be in the sign opposite where you would expect it, or at a distance from the composite Sun that would be impossible in a natal chart. What you describe could only happen if the composite were done for three or more people.
Posted by: Robert | September 12, 2008 at 07:53 AM
Hello Robert, please enlighten me to a composite chart( midpoint system). Sun in cancer on 3rd house, opposing Venus in cappy in the 8th house(orb 3 degrees), moon in 5th libra , trine mercury in leo on 3rd house, mars in 4th also leo, asc 29 taurus, jupiter in gemini in the 2nd house, saturn rx in pisces conjoint to Chiron on 11th. Neptun on 6th scorpio. Mars squaring Nodal axis (5 degrees orb) Do you think this relationship will have longevity? What is the lesson to learn, the Saturnian one? Any help is very much appreciated.
Thank you.
Pranaams.
Posted by: moon2lightshadow | September 13, 2008 at 08:17 AM
Hi moon2lightshadow - I cannot do justice to the analysis of a composite chart in a comment stream. Longevity has everything to do with how the individuals involved are spiritually harmonious or not and the choices they make at critical transit and progressed points in their own individual 7th house affairs. That's the free will component of our life on Earth. The composite chart only exists as a function of the blend; it must always be related to the individuals since it does not exist without the participation of both.
Posted by: Robert | September 14, 2008 at 12:52 PM
Robert,
I find the free will aspect the most fascinating of all astrological components -- particularly if we choose situations and lessons before we are born (and they are manifested as opportunities in our charts).
If we have the power to choose, why do we fail to master? What exactly determines our ability to make a decision that would satisfy the soul when it chooses opportunities for growth?
Best,
Annette
Posted by: Annette | September 15, 2008 at 02:18 AM
Hi Annette - It's not that we choose specific circumstances, but by our charts we choose the timing on when we shall confront certain lessons. The exact form of how we learn those lessons is determined by a host of prior choices. In our childhood, by our parents and to some extent ourselves. In our adulthood, entirely by ourselves.
We choose the circumstances, but not the lessons. The lessons are universal, while the circumstances are local. Why did we fail to master them the last time around? It doesn't matter. It only matters that we learn mastery of human-ness the best we're able at each turn of the wheel while we're here. Then we learn how to make these of service to others within the limits of the "prime directive."
We do not "choose to grow." Only ego believes it has a choice to grow or not. Evolution is a one way street. We only become more aware, even if only of our own ignorance. Eternal growth IS the nature of the Eternal Self, since we are free to explore cosmos forever and a day. ANY decision in any moment is entirely up to our Consciousness. How connected or disconnected our ego is relative to our Eternal Self determines whether we miss the mark or move into forms of mastery.
Posted by: Robert | September 15, 2008 at 08:40 AM
Robert,
Interesting. However, I'm not sure I believe that growth is inevitable and that it's only a question of awareness about that growth that is at stake in the lessons we learn.
I believe that change is inevitable, but change is only certainly growth with awareness. So without awareness, change can take us in the opposite direction. We can either grow or move toward death. I think either direction is changeable as well, with awareness -- and the accompanying attitudes and behaviors that allow growth (or deny it).
Growth seems as much about choices of behavior and awareness as is dying.
That's what I believe, anyway.
Best,
Annette
Posted by: Annette | September 19, 2008 at 02:53 AM
Hi Annette - Growth is a one way street. We cannot "not grow." We can choose to grow in ways that may appear to be counterproductive to our better interests, but we're growing nonetheless, even if toward death of the body through fulfilling potentials. We grow in many ways whether we're aware of it or not. We grow until we die, and all die at some point unless they have become Masters of Yoga in its higher forms.
All forms of living life generate patterns. These are productive in fulfilling whatever is written in "the book" in one form or another. Even when we screw up bigtime, it's still productive, since eventually all patterns that lead us to pain (or pleasure, for that matter!) will show us the need for detachment, dispassion, discrimination, and setting our own agenda toward whatever is our "will to good." We replace lesser illusions of "good" with greater ones through our experience, and even the unskilled thief who becomes a master thief eventually learns that "he who steals is stolen from." The nature of "thief-ness" guarantees that lesson will be learned.
ALL things are grist for the mill of Soul, and what is bad for one may not be a hinderance for another under temporary conditions (aren't they all?) Even a heroin addict could become a saint for Free Speech, like Lenny, or in another space-time, compose "Give Peace A Chance" and "All You Need Is Love." We cannot say whether these things would have happened under other conditions, but we can see that even heroin doesn't have to be an impediment for doing one's higher being, however imperfectly that may be expressed.
Of course, some behaviors do yield better results along certain evolutionary lines than others. I'd rather read HPB, Alice Bailey, Agni Yoga, or Manly P. Hall than any of the new age dreck out there speculating that our DNA was stolen by evil space people. And definitely give me the I Ching over Hunk-Ra any day!
Posted by: Robert | September 20, 2008 at 06:58 AM
When you define growth this broadly, I definitely agree.
And I also agree that Lenny Bruce was a saint for free speech. Strange how George Carlin just lifted his routine about words not to say, with no comment from anyone I've ever heard.
I like Ram Dass over Hunk-Ra. There's a great example of what you are talking about -- he says he "was stroked".
Anyone interested in the notion of developing through situations and karma -- and who hasn't seen the film "Fierce Grace" should rent it.
Posted by: Annette | September 20, 2008 at 08:43 AM